King Lear

A king there was, by name of Lear,

Who sat back on his derry-ear,

and had the strangest sort of craze

to split his kingdom up three ways.

He gave a piece to daughters three

And basked in their false flattery.

Except Cordelia, youngest one;

She didn't think BS was fun

And so, polite, but not effusive,

She found her daddy turn abusive.

He told her she must hit the road,

That foolish, vain, and grim old toad!

But soon old Lear found his mistake

As daughters two and three did make

Him feel unwelcome anywhere

He cared to place his dinnerware.

At last he goes out in the storm—

A lone and dreary tragic form.

His fool goes blithely by his side

But all his jokes are rather snide.

A lot of other stuff occurs

and in the end old Lear abjures

his hasty judgments and repents

and asks Cordelia to come hence.

But she gets murdered by some Duke

or another royal kook.

Old man Lear thus leaves the stage

With nothing but despair and rage.

If I am ever old and rich

I'll throw my kingdom in a ditch

So that my kids can sink or swim

Without my money's evil whim.

Of course, with this economy,

They soon must be supporting me!

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