THE CLEAR MARKS OF EARMARKS
Shooting earmarks to his friends with power like Big Bertha
In the halls of Congress stands the mighty John P. Murtha.
This Pennsylvania Democrat no stone unturned will leave
To follow that old Bible verse: "To ask – and then receive."
Earmarks in the millions he will pass into our laws.
Appropriations are to him as toys to Santa Claus.
He will never leave unheard a lobbyist's request
If their pockets jingle loud and they come in well-dressed.
Have a farm that needs a cow? A factory a boost?
A bridge in need of toll booth, hoboes a safer roost?
If it's in his district then good Murtha will come through.
He will get pet projects paid with pennies not a few.
Where's the money coming from for all these costly sprockets?
Out of something bottomless – our own ragged pockets.
Some there are in Congress who don't like to play this game;
They think using earmarks is a fraud and crying shame.
Timid souls, they do not know about the birds and bees;
That Congress is the only place where money grows on trees!
Murtha knows that earmarks are what keeps our country rich;
Or at least will put us all into the same deep ditch.
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