THE JACK-IN-THE-BOX
The patient had been sinking fast.
The doctor shook his head.
Some fresh air was requested as
He wheezed away in bed.
They gave him some
The change was a surprise.
The patient bounced right out of bed
To blink his merry eyes.
"I've beat Mitt Romney, that's for sure!
And
He said with an heroic grin
"or I'm not John McCain!"
"Delusional" the doctor said
"The patient must have rest.
He's old and frail and smells somewhat
Of moss and sparrow's nest."
"Ha! Ha!" McCain yells out in glee.
"I am no longer ill."
The doctor stroked his beard and said
"How will you pay your bill?"
At this McCain looked sly and wise.
He asked for his wool coat:
"Just send the bill to
and don't forget to vote!"
Then up he bounced and out he went
As nimbly as a flea
To laugh and sing and dance upon
The grave of Huckabee.
While looking for the gravesite he
Came across a pollster
Who said "I see that you've been low –
Your points I shall bolster."
He waved his magic pollster wand
And right before their eyes
His popularity increased
To a gigantic size.
"My fee for this good deed I did
will be quite small" he says.
But John McCain runs off too fast:
"Bill me when I am Prez!"
McCain pulled up to rest beside
A spacious leafy tree
And out did pop an adman who
Said "Get publicity!"
The candidate sat back and watched
The adman do his stuff,
Turning him into a jewel
From just a zircon rough.
"Voila!" the adman cried with pride.
"The whole world knows your face.
Now if you'll pay –" but 'twas too late,
For off McCain did race.
"Why do these folk think I am rich?"
he asked himself aloud.
But just then he did spot nearby
A large and waiting crowd.
"If only I could give a speech"
our poor McCain did sob,
"but I don't have a thing to say
to this unfriendly mob."
"Fear not!" a writer sang out clear.
"I'll write for you a speech
that makes them trust you as a friend
and for their wallets reach."
He wrote it fast, he wrote it clean.
McCain read it with dash
And all the foolish people gave
Him tons of ready cash.
But when the writer asked for coin
To cover his carfare
He looked in vain to find McCain,
Vanished into thin air.
At last Convention time did come
And creditors galore
Were looking for McCain so they
Could give him some what-for.
But cornered, he did not repent
Or pay them his arrears.
Instead he asked them for a loan . . .
To run in four more years.
So let this be a lesson to
All voters in the land:
A politician has no shame
When he holds out his hand.
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