Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Cinderella . . . the rest of the story

After Cinderella put the slipper on her foot

No longer did she labor in the ashes or the soot.

She moved into the Palace with the Prince right by her side.

Their wedding was most beautiful and everybody cried.

Her stepsisters remained at home, as ugly as could be,

Eating Haagen Dazs ice cream and watching the TV.

But strange to say the stepsisters began to really bloom,

And by their middle twenties they could light up any room.

A plastic surgeon helped them out, as well as liposuction.

They went to Paris for their gowns and haute cuisine instruction.

Meanwhile Cinderella had five children in a row;

She got a lot of wrinkles and her hips began to show.

The Prince turned out to be a bum with lots of drinking buddies,

Leaving Cinderella with the castle fuddy-duddys.

She started taking sleeping pills and flirting with the help.

She let herself go right to pot – her hair became like kelp.

One day when all the sleeping pills could not erase her sorrow,

She went to see her stepsisters, a jug of wine to borrow.

When she beheld their graceful lives, all elegance and chic,

She ran back to her castle with a grimace and shriek.

She told the executioner to rid her of their presence,

And burn the whole chalet right down with help from local peasants.

When the deed was over Cinderella felt quite fine.

Next she bumped her husband off with doctored-up moonshine.

She sent her kids to boarding school and reigned without remorse,

Raising all the taxes, waging war with awful force.

Finally the people threw her off her mighty throne,

And locked her in a dungeon where she perished all alone.

Let this be a lesson to those seeking their Prince Charming –

When our wishes are fulfilled, results can be alarming.



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