Pinocchio became a boy and lived with old Gepetto;
'twas only then he noticed they resided in a ghetto.
The shacks around him, picturesque by moonlight it is true,
In daylight took on squalor and a smell just like the zoo.
Gepetto's loft was cold and damp, he had no means to heat it.
Their food was mush and herring bones; he could hardly eat it.
At school Pinocchio found out his brains were still of wood;
He wore a dunce cap every day, and in the corner stood.
The cricket was no help at all; he strummed a ukulele
and sang off-key and suddenly bet the ponies daily.
His losses were so heavy that he pawned Geppeto's tools
To keep from being beaten up by Cosa Nostra mules.
Pinocchio dropped out of school and ran with the wrong crowd;
He started being sassy, mean, and cussed away out loud.
He hijacked cars, went into bars, and caused a lot of trouble;
The cricket got him betting on the wicked daily double.
Finally the Blue Fairy came down again to wonder
If she'd been mistaken and had pulled a major blunder.
Before she could do anything Pinocchio had grabbed her,
Stole her jewels and magic wand and then he gently stabbed her.
It wasn't long before the kid was running his own gang;
Geppeto prophesized that soon he'd surely have to hang.
But instead he was the head of business corporations
That sold and traded lots of things in many different nations.
To terrorists he sold good guns, to madmen atom bombs;
To hospitals he sold cheap drugs that had them singing psalms.
With cheap cement he built some schools that certainly would topple.
He was a guest on TV shows with people like Ted Koppel.
He got to be quite wealthy and respected and admired;
He had the cricket downsized and Geppeto he had fired.
Pinocchio Incorporated is a big concern;
With bonuses, the management has money they can burn.
On Wall Street now Pinocchio keeps bankers on their toes.
The secret to his power is . . . his nose no longer grows.
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