Bonus

 

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Don't I get a bonus for my oral hygiene care?
My dentist says my teeth will make all other people stare.
Don't I have a contract that rewards me with big bucks
for making funny noises that can sound like fire trucks?
And what about my nose hairs?  I have trimmed them every day.
It's morally imperative that somebody should pay.
Maybe I am not the best at anything I do;
still, I've earned a bonus and I'm taking it from you.
Sure, I'm bonus-happy -- that's American tradition:
Every time I screw up I am paid a big commission!

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