Hello Dummy!

HELLO DUMMY

 

This blessed year 2008

We chose a write-in candidate.

One dark horse without much beauty

Known to all as grim Judge Judy.

 

She wasted no time on mere blab.

She put the country in rehab.

Her first act as the president

Was charging Congress a steep rent.

 

"They have a warm place where they snooze

while children go without good shoes.

Prostituting their great power –

I will charge them by the hour!"

 

She then ruled that the Pentagon

Should all their weapons put in pawn

To buy each person in Iraq

A bodyguard against attack.

 

She lined up all the CEO's

To let the laid-off punch their nose.

And now she turns her beady eye

Upon what she calls "that pig sty."

 

She means, of course, the CIA;

They're put on unpaid holiday

Until, she says, birds learn to bark

Or Ringo Star becomes a narc.

 

Emulating Andrew Jackson

Her language is Anglo-Saxon;

"Morons!  Dimwits!  Ninnyhammers!

Jump out of those silk pyjammers!"

 

"Office holders better wake up

unless leaves they like to rake up!"

"And postage stamps are now a dime

but junk mail I decree a crime!"

 

Our U.N. rep she quickly sacked,

Then read out loud the riot act:

"Red China, you pollute the world;

and from this joint you should be hurled!"

 

"Yo, Putin, you Slavonic shrimp,

you've got more hot air than a blimp!"

"Iran had better watch their step;

I'll show them atom bombs with pep!"

 

"The North Koreans don't scare me.

I'll gas them with their own kimchee!"

"That OPEC better cheapen oil

or in it I will have them boil!"

 

We clawed each other's backs with joy –

This lady was no tinker toy!

Judge Judy made the fat cats squirm,

Encouraging the turning worm.

 

But then she went a bit too far

And called for feathers and some tar

To treat with those who owed back tax

Or credit cards began to max.

 

"Go get a job, you deadbeat scum

or on the rack your guts I'll strum!"

"There are no laws that you can break

and no excuse that you can fake!"

 

We sickened as we realized

Our problems we had super-sized.

We begged Congress to impeach her –

She was such a nagging creature!

 

 

 

Congress, itching to get even,

Set to work her shroud a-weavin'.

So her gavel and invective

Finally made her defective.

 

Her V.P. stepped up to the plate

To navigate the ship of state.

I'm not sure we're free of pickles . . .

Our new leader is Don Rickles.

---

Climb to the top of the charts! Play the word scramble challenge with star power. Play now!