Wednesday, February 13, 2008

more nursery rhymes for modern times

MORE NURSERY RHYMES FOR MODERN TIMES

 

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To post a letter first-class.

They found the price had risen twice

So now they use their email.

 

This little piggy went on welfare.

This little piggy lost his home.

This little piggy had some issues.

This little piggy had a gun.

And that little piggy was a bad little piggy.

He ran Bang Bang Bang all the way home.

 

Little Miss Muffet

Went to the buffet,

Eating transfatty oils.

She had a fried spider

Which went off inside her.

She's now in a nursing home.

 

Old King Cole

Saw the exit poll.

The exit poll saw he.

It was not complete

But since he was beat

He fired his fiddlers three.

 

Jack be nimble.

Jack be sick.

No insurance – he's up a crick!

 

 

Wee Willie Winkie

Ran through the town.

Steroids and pills turned

His muscles brown.

He knocked at the door

Of his pharmacist

And told him his toes

Had turned into a fist.



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