Monday, November 15, 2010

I (heart) Lawyers

If I were a lawyer I would look for suckers who

I could push some company or hospital to sue.

I'd paint a lovely picture of the cash they soon would gain

By letting me put price tags on their agony and pain.

I'd lead 'em by the nose for months and years and longer still,

And then present them with an outsized monster of a bill.

I'd spend a lot of money getting experts, sending mail,

Going out to dinner (escargot is French for snail!)

So natchrally I'd borrow from a subprime fly-by-nighter

To pay for ev'ry perjurer and high-toned, wordy blighter.

And if my worthy clients did not settle on the spot,

I'd pretty soon make things for them become so doggone hot

They'd have to flee the country, and I'd get their house and car –

And that is how I'd get to be a legal superstar!

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